Friday, January 4, 2008

Oh, Britney. Oh, Honey.

There are really no words to describe what is happening to Britney Spears.

By now I’m sure you all have heard about her breakdown last night, which started when she refused to hand her kids over to KFed and escalated to the point where she was taken away in an ambulance. She is now under a 72-hour mandatory hold in the psych ward of Cedars Sinai, and it has just been announced that she has (finally) lost all custodial rights of her two boys.

Literally, yesterday I said to Talya, “Britney is going to die.” And then this happened about 4 hours later! It is so completely unbelievable – reading on blogs or in magazines what happens to her everyday is literally like reading a soap opera. She is EXACTLY the definition of a trainwreck – you know its bad to look, but you cant bear to look away.

Lynn Spears (Mother of the Year) called into Access Hollywood today and basically could not say anything except cry, which was kind of sad and kind of pathetic. In between sobs she managed to say, “Pray for Britney.” So pathetic. I really had high hopes that Britney was going to turn her life around after she released Blackout. It is SUCH a good CD – every song is great (especially number 8).

I honestly can’t say anything about Britney that hasn’t been said before. Trent on Pink Is The New Blog thinks that this might be the wakeup call she needs to totally get her shit together before she loses it and totally hits rock bottom, but I don’t know. I thought she hit rock bottom a long time ago, and she keeps surprising me every day with something new and fucked up.

Remember how hot she used to be? Remember when she performed with the fucking snake? Remember when she came out at the 2000 VMA’s in that black suit with the hat, and then started dancing and it fell off to reveal that nude bodysuit with all the sequins? I remember watching that. I remember screaming about how amazing she was. SCREAMING.

(Side note. Jacob and I just spent 45 minutes watching old Brit videos on YouTube. His top 5 in the following order: Oops I Did It Again, You Drive Me Crazy, Toxic, Baby One More Time, Slave For You. My top 5 in the following order: You Drive Me Crazy, Stronger, Toxic, Slave For You, and Do Something. This is based on how fucking hot she looked in each video.)

Ugh. This is depressing me. Moving on. You all thought I’d be over this football thing, but I’m not, so ha. Here are my picks for this weekend’s games:

Washington Redskins at Seattle Seahawks – I pick Seattle because its always rainy there and its raining here right now. I really like rain, especially when I am in bed wearing my pink socks.

New York Giants at Tampa Bay Buccaneers – I choose Tampa Bay because right now my mom and my sister are in Florida so this is a shout out for them. Also I may have mentioned this last week, but I like the word Buccaneers.

Jacksonville Jaguars at Pittsburgh Steelers – I choose Jaguars because they are kind of like leopards which is my favorite type of print. Also I do not even know what a steeler is.

Tennessee Titans at San Diego Chargers – I choose San Diego because I’ve been there and its pretty nice. Jacob and Anna and Michael Katzman are from Tennessee but I’ve never been there so I don’t know anything about it except the bbq is supposed to be good and Elvis lived there.

So there you have it. Britney is cracked out and I pay attention to the NFL. What has the world come to?

1 comment:

Danielle Rideau said...

Jordan! you asked for a comment (and promised a shout out, I might add) so here it is. I was waiting for a post that really moved me, and frankly, bspears moves me (especially when #2 is playing). I agree, sister. Trainwreck of the year, ane we're just 4 days in. Oh, and you are perfectly justified in your picks for football. Those are all great reasons for those teams to win. I hope you prove victorious.